
Making friends in a new country can feel awkward, uncertain, and at times, even intimidating. But it’s also one of the most rewarding aspects of studying abroad. While some people click instantly, others take time to find their group. So what actually makes it easier—or harder—to form new connections in a foreign environment? Let’s dive into the science and psychology of making friends while studying abroad.
1. Your Brain on New Social Experiences
Moving abroad activates what neuroscientists call “social learning mode.” When everything is unfamiliar—language, customs, even body language—your brain becomes more alert and open to picking up new patterns. This mental flexibility can actually make you more receptive to forming connections.
What it means for students: You’re wired to adapt socially in a new environment, even if it feels uncomfortable at first.
2. Shared Struggles Bond People
According to social psychology, shared challenges create fast friendships. Trying to open a bank account, navigate the bus system, or survive a group project in a second language all create a sense of “we’re in this together.” That’s a powerful bond.
What it means for students: Don’t underestimate how a mutual rant about paperwork or a confusing supermarket trip can turn into a lasting friendship.
3. Language = Vulnerability = Trust
Speaking in a second language often forces us to drop our polished exterior. We get real—quick. Studies show that when people are vulnerable, others perceive them as more trustworthy and likeable.
What it means for students: Struggling with Spanish or English? Good. Those shared laughs over grammar mistakes and awkward translations can break down barriers fast.
4. Proximity Still Matters
The “mere exposure effect” says that people tend to like others they see often. This means that even casual greetings in the hallway or shared classes can eventually build familiarity and comfort.
What it means for students: Say hi to that person you keep seeing at the coffee shop or outside your building. Friendship often starts with a few simple nods or small talk.
5. Cultural Curiosity Goes a Long Way
Asking someone about their culture, food, or hometown shows genuine interest—and people love to share what’s familiar to them. It’s not just friendly; it’s scientifically shown to increase interpersonal liking and connection.
What it means for students: Be curious. Ask questions. Don’t pretend to know everything—because that humility makes you more approachable.
6. The Role of Time and Repetition
Friendship doesn’t usually happen overnight. Studies show that it can take 40–60 hours of shared time to form a casual friendship, and 200+ hours for a close one.
What it means for students: Be patient. Keep showing up. Whether it’s a language exchange group or weekly tapas nights, consistency builds connection.
Conclusion
Making friends abroad isn’t just luck—it’s a mix of psychology, effort, and timing. And while it might feel slow at first, the friendships you form while living in a new country often turn out to be some of the most meaningful in your life. Why? Because they’re built on growth, challenge, and shared experience.
👉 Ready to take the leap? Say yes to that dinner invite, join that language exchange, or just start with a simple “Hola.” You never know what kind of connection is waiting just one conversation away.
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