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If Netflix Characters Rented in Segovia: A Satirical Guide

Netflix characters renting in Segovia

When international students start looking for housing in Segovia, they face a simple but very personal question: What kind of flat suits me? Is it about the location? The budget? The vibe? Or maybe it’s about finding an apartment that would fit your TV personality if your life were a Netflix series.

Let’s imagine what would happen if some of our favorite Netflix characters had to find student housing in Segovia. Spoiler: the results are as different as their shows.

Because while finding a student apartment here is much easier than in Madrid, Berlin, or London (as we’ve discussed plenty of times), how you approach it says a lot about you.

Emily Cooper (Emily in Paris) — “Where’s the best light for my Instagram?”

Emily arrives in Segovia with oversized sunglasses, four suitcases, and one mission: to find the most Instagrammable student apartment possible. She doesn’t need to understand the rental contract (or speak Spanish fluently). What matters most is the aesthetic.

Emily’s housing checklist:

  • Balcony with a direct view of the Roman Aqueduct (“for my stories”)
  • Interior stone walls for “European authenticity”
  • Perfect lighting for breakfast flat-lays
  • A retro coffee machine for that influencer vibe

She’s not particularly concerned about the rent (“It’s an investment for my brand!”), nor about practicalities like heating costs in winter. Fast Wi-Fi is, of course, non-negotiable, because there’s no content without connectivity.

Within 30 minutes of arriving, Emily has already toured three flats, posted 27 Instagram stories, asked where the nearest café with oat milk is, and negotiated with the landlord using Google Translate and pure charm.

And yes, her friends back home are already jealous.

Wednesday Addams (Wednesday) — “I hope it’s haunted.”

Wednesday’s search looks a little different. She’s drawn to Segovia’s historic center for different reasons: old stone walls, centuries-old buildings, the faint possibility of resident ghosts. A little bit of mystery suits her perfectly.

Wednesday’s housing checklist:

  • Dark, heavy curtains (“Sunlight is an inconvenience”)
  • Gothic arches, creaky floors, and drafty windows are a plus
  • Absolute silence required — noisy neighbors will be hexed
  • Ravens or black cats welcome

When shown a bright, modern apartment with white walls and minimalist decor, Wednesday politely responds with a flat “No.” She prefers something with character, where centuries of history still echo in the walls. Ideally, it’s a bit unsettling for anyone else but her.

Her motto? “Give me the place no one else wants.”

Surprisingly, Segovia’s historic Old Town offers plenty of options that might appeal to Wednesday’s taste for the beautifully eerie.

The Money Heist Crew (La Casa de Papel) — “We’ll negotiate.”

When El Profesor and his crew go apartment hunting in Segovia, they bring all their negotiation skills — and a slight sense of paranoia.

Money Heist crew housing checklist:

  • Location: discreet, central, multiple exits (for “safety reasons”)
  • Basement or storage space for “equipment”
  • Room for secret meetings and detailed planning sessions
  • Secure internet connection (“preferably untraceable”)

The landlord offers a fair price. They, of course, counteroffer. Every rent negotiation feels like a hostage situation, complete with timelines, conditions, and serious eye contact.

For this crew, the real estate agent experience is unforgettable:

“You’re charging HOW much per month? No, no, we’re going to lower that. Do you want hostages? We can negotiate hostages.”

In reality, most students don’t need tactical plans to rent in Segovia, but The Money Heist crew would probably insist on renting under aliases anyway — just for fun.

Joe Goldberg (You) — “Nice view… into everyone’s windows.”

Joe arrives in Segovia looking for something cozy — and a little bit creepy. He wants privacy, but with a strategic view of his neighbors.

Joe’s housing checklist:

  • Balcony or large windows with clear views of surrounding apartments
  • Quiet building with limited visitors
  • Basement or secret storage space (for reasons)
  • Excellent Wi-Fi for online “research”

Unlike most students, Joe isn’t concerned about proximity to campus or nightlife. He wants solitude — but still wants to observe everyone else.

In Segovia, he might request an apartment overlooking the Plaza Mayor or a side street near the Aqueduct, carefully noting which buildings have open curtains at night.

You probably won’t want Joe as your roommate, but he will know when your laundry day is.

Nairobi (La Casa de Papel) — “Boom boom ciao, welcome to my place!”

Nairobi would turn any student apartment into the ultimate party house within 48 hours. For her, the apartment is less about quiet studying and more about living life to the fullest.

Nairobi’s housing checklist:

  • Large living room (for spontaneous parties)
  • Loud music system allowed
  • Friendly neighbors who don’t mind a bit of noise
  • Balcony for late-night storytelling

For Nairobi, Segovia’s lively student scene is a perfect match. Between tapas nights, group dinners, and endless storytelling, her apartment would quickly become the unofficial student hub for everyone who’s anyone.

If Segovia’s old walls could talk, they’d be singing Bella Ciao by the end of her first month here.

Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher) — “I just need a bathtub.”

Geralt isn’t difficult to please. He travels light, keeps to himself, and would probably avoid human contact if possible.

Geralt’s housing checklist:

  • Simple, quiet, remote location preferred
  • A large bathtub (non-negotiable)
  • No loud neighbors, drama, or interruptions
  • Close proximity to nature (because “the mountains are calling”)

In Segovia, Geralt would likely choose a small stone house outside the city walls, perhaps near the hills or countryside. His only visitors would be the occasional lost hiker or fellow monster hunter.

But when winter hits, even Geralt would appreciate the comfort of Segovia’s cozy cafés and warm churros.

The Real Student Housing Experience in Segovia

While your student housing search may not involve secret heists, gothic tastes, or obsessive surveillance, finding a flat in Segovia actually is refreshingly easy compared to many larger European cities.

For most international students, €700–€900 a month can get you:

  • A fully furnished apartment
  • Utilities included (up to a generous cap)
  • Maintenance service and reliable Wi-Fi
  • A 5–10 minute walk to university, cafés, and historic landmarks

Unlike the crowded rental markets in London or Berlin, Segovia offers students a calm, safe, and highly walkable lifestyle — without sacrificing charm, culture, or convenience.

Conclusion: Which Netflix Character Are You?

If you’re moving to Segovia to study, you don’t need to channel The Professor or Emily Cooper to find a great place. Whether you lean toward Wednesday’s quiet, Nairobi’s social life, or Geralt’s solitude, Segovia has something that fits.

And the best part? No drama required. Just pack your suitcase, bring an open mind, and prepare for one of the most unique student experiences you’ll ever have.

👉 Ready to find your perfect student apartment? Browse our available apartments in Segovia — haunted houses optional.

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